Dick’s Military Application is AWOL

The bureaucratic organization entrusted with our national security and whose claim to fame include the assassination of bin Laden, the drone attack that killed al-Awlaki, and whose air strikes disposed of Gadhafi lose Dick’s military application.

An anonymous source (whom Dick is very thankful to) has provided Dick the list of all candidates seen at the last officer selection board. Obviously Dick is not among the selected. However Dick is also not among the non-selected. Immediate calls to Dick’s recruiter, and the person in charge of the naval recruiting district and his congressman’s office were not returned.

Of course as always the actual document with names redacted is there for everyone’s perusal. Right now someone has got to reeling and wondering how Dick ever got the best of them. pilot list fy12_redacted

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9 Comments

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9 responses to “Dick’s Military Application is AWOL

  1. Grover Mannings

    Dick this beats Wikileaks by a mile :).

    What about just enlisting as a sailor? Yes, you won’t be a commissioned officer, but you will be in the military.

    Good Luck,

    Grover Mannings

    • Sorry Grover but enlisting requires an age waiver also. In most cases there are age waivers for prior service. For example the Navy will grant age waivers up to 48 months (four years) for those with prior military service up to the age of 31 for naval flight officer.

      If I serve an enlistment contract which is for four years that makes me 35 years of age. It moves me closer to the age where it is harder to get a waiver. After 35 I will have to change the Constitution.

      Then people sometimes pull the why didn’t you apply earlier card? Until I tell them my application was submitted well under the age limit of 29. It is just that these clowns can’t get it right. Everyone agrees that I should write the President, however I know the military is all about chain of command. So I’m trying to stick by it. I don’t want to pull out the Obama card at least not yet. But this looks more likely as the days become weeks and the weeks become months.

  2. Grover Mannings

    Whoops it’s late sorry for the triplicate posts

  3. zed

    You obviously don’t want this bad enough or else you would have “pulled the Obama card” already. Quit feeling sorry for yourself, man up, and do something with your life already. Its like all you strive for in life is just another sad story to post on the internet.

    • “Pull the Obama card?” First of all I have not even been rejected yet. The board can’t even get my application from point A to point B. It’s too early for the Obama card. That is for the Christmas/Hanukkah season finale. It will be so good the Jews will light a tenth candle.

  4. zed

    Keep making excuses… this is why you will always be a fucking loser

    • Wow. If this person has so much hatred towards Dick; I need you to tell your friends about this website. That way they can log on and post more angry comments and criticism.

      If I was a winner there would be no need for this website. Think about it, if I was banging the hottest women, had the coolest job and a motorcycle, I wouldn’t have time to spread lies about people.

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