My Friends…the Homophobes

I will make a statement right now and all my male friends will shake their head in denial. “Most if not all of my male friends are homophobes.”

Two weeks ago the day after gay marriage was signed into law Daryl White told me one of his close friends came out of the closet two years ago. I sort of suspected he was gay and Daryl asked me how.  It’s simple, Daryl’s friendship with him withered. Over the last two years they hung out less and less. Daryl and my brother had a childhood friend who dated a girl. Over the years this “girl” who discovered she was transgender gradually underwent a sex change. Some time later their close childhood friend admitted he was gay. My brother and Daryl blame this girl’s transgender behavior on why their friend became gay. Over the years they visited him when he was living out of state with a boyfriend probably in the hopes they could change his mind, and gradually they drifted apart.

Sadly Shonna told me last week that she  suspects a lot of my male friends are still in the closet. She talks about a coworker of ours who used to be in the military and run ultramarathons. However you would never catch my male friends in a gay club, hear that a coworker is gay and they’ll run in the other direction. And you hear my guy friends speak about the girls they bang. It’s always those who show the most interest and tell us who they bedded last night who may possibly be gay.

The lesson learned is that if you are gay and know my male friends do not come out of the closet if you don’t want to lose them as friends. because like I said at the beginning of this entry. “Most if not all of my male friends are homophobes.”


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